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Wow i have realy messed up this time.  Looks like i wont be able to fix it eaither...  My one true friend now has been completly hurt by me.....  I didnt even realize how much this would realy affect me or mainly others.... if any of you are reading this i want you to know im going to go get help... When i come back.... ill make things right.... dosnt mean we will be friends if you hate me that much..... its just that i will set things right and not leave this a open wound.   Im going to resedintal and im going to get fixed....   Finaly ill be healthy.... you guys knew i wasnt i could tell you felt it....  Give me time... i will make things right